My name is Aloysious Christopher Parker and, if I ever have a son, he'll be Charles Christopher Parker. Just like Charlie Parker. The people I know just call me Allie, and this is my story -- or part of it. I don't expect it to explain all that much, but what's a story anyway, except one of those connect-the-dots drawings that in the end forms a picture of something. That's really all this is. That's how things work for me. I go from this place, this person to that place or person. And, you know,it doesn't really make that much difference. I've known all different kinds of people. Hung out with them, lived with them, watched them act things out in their own little ways. And to me...to me, those people I've known are like a series of rooms, just like all the places where I've spent time. You walk in for the first time curious about this new room -- the lamp, TV, whatever. And then, after a while, the newness is gone, completely. And then there's this kind of dread, kind of creeping dread. You probably don't evenknow what I'm talking about. But anyway I guess the point of all this is that after a while, something tells you, some voice speaks to you, and that's it. Time to split. Go someplace else. People are going to be basically the same. Maybe use some different kind of refrigerator or toilet or something. But this thing tells you, and you have to start to drift. You may not even want to go, but things will inform you. So here I am now in a place where I don't even understand their language. But, you know, strangers are still always just strangers. And the story, this part of the story, well, it's how I got from there to here. Or maybe I should say from here to here.
I'm tired of being alone. Everyone is alone. That's why I just drift, you know. People think it's crazy but it's better to think that you're not alone when you are drifting even though you are, instead of just knowing that you're alone all the time. Some people, you know, they can distract themselves with ambitions and motivation to work but it's not for me. They think people like myself are crazy. Everyone does. Because of the way I live. I don't know. I guess you can say it's reckless but it's the only way for me. My mother was like those kind of people telling me it's bad to be like that. And she ended up crazy herself, you know, after my father was gone. But I don't care anymore and I don't want to think about it. I know that when I get the feeling, the drift is gonna take me.
